I am a person who likes Nice Things, and I am also a person that quite often looks at the prices of nice things, and shrieks “How fucking much?!” Consequently, I keep one eye half-open like a crocodile, constantly scanning for moments when the nice things I need or want are offered as complimentary, or redeemable against purchase.
I am very skilled at finding ways to maximise the amount of nice things in my life. But I never want to play the poor-mouth, be a wheedler, or a tight-arse. I like relationships that are reciprocal.
COMPLIMENTARY GIFT OR SEVICE
You don’t have to purchase anything when a service is complimentary. Something complimentary is freely given, with no obligation on the receiver of the freely given thing to respond or to reciprocate. That’s important, and should never be diluted, or abused.
But. I think there’s an important concept to bear in mind here, and the clue is in the word. COMPLIMENTARY sounds very like COMPLIMENT, don’t you think?
Imagine I say to Margot: “You look particularly gorgeous today, Margot dear, and what a cunning shoe!”
Margot is under no obligation to say anything nice back to me, but let’s be honest here. If she didn’t come up with something along the lines of:
“And you yourself look especially toothsome, my dear iBeheld, and the stitching of your chemise is so parfait, I’d think you had it done by little French elves”
– you’d think Margot was being a bit of a cow, wouldn’t you?
A compliment is freely given, with no expectation of it being returned … but it’s nicer all around when it is returned, no?
So this is why, when I accept a complimentary service (of the type that involves BOOKING someone’s time, not the random ‘would you like your hand massaged while you stuff canapes with the other, madam’ popular at press events and launches) it is almost always because I have done the maths and figured out
a) that I was intending to splash the value of the complimentary thing, and
b) that I am confident that I can and I will splash that cash, with that particular retailer/brand, and come away with a purchase I am completely happy with and the joy of the complimentary thing to boot.
And in that way, I feel that the relationship between me and the Complimentary Service provider is reciprocal. And that makes me happy.
REDEEMABLE AGAINST PURCHASE
BUY ONE GET ONE FREE and OTHER VOLUME-RELATED INDUCEMENTS
Buy One and Get One Free and its volume-related pals: 50% MORE, 2 FOR 1, Buy 3 Get 1 Free! – can all offer excellent value providing that one of the three scenarios below is true:
- it’s a thing that you love
- a thing that you use regularly and/or in enormous amounts
- something you will share with a friend.
The photo that illustrates this post is from a trip to France in which I took full advantage of the pharmacy BOG-OFFs (to use the inelegant acronym). These were shared out back in London between me, the YGB and Margot, and the Heavy Leg Cream in particular was joyously received.
Never buy a BOGOF (or any volume offer) just because it’s a ‘bargain’! If you buy a BOGOF, make sure you have a destination in mind for the second one. There’s nothing more depressing than never getting to the end of a ‘bargain’ purchase you’ve grown terribly bored with, but that you can’t bear to replace as that would be ‘a waste’.
Dante probably devoted a Circle of Hell to this concept in his first draft of his Inferno.
The TLDR here, especially if you’re skint, is
- Keep your eyes peeled for complimentary or redeemable against purchase offers from brands that you like and trust: there are usually a fair few to choose from.
- More stuff for the same amount of money can be amazingly good value, providing that you actually love the stuff you’ve just bought in industrial quantities, but it will feel like the worst purchase ever if you don’t like the stuff. Remember the old saying: “Never mind the quality, feel the width”? That’s the psychology behind this type of offer: keep quality, not quantity, at the forefront of your mind!
- Don’t be shy about seeking bargains – rich people certainly aren’t!
